Relationships can have very important and special roles in our lives. You can have a relationship with yourself, your family, your friends, your romantic partners … the options are endless! It is up to you to decide the type of relationships you want to have in your life. A lot of people find happiness and comfort through intimate relationships, whether they involve sexual activity or not. Relationships that involve sexual activity might be monogamous, non-monogamous, polyamorous… all different forms! You have the right to choose the relationships you want to have in a way that is consensual, trusting and respectful.
Healthy Relationships
A healthy relationship will make you feel good about yourself and your partner(s). It will take a lot of work from everyone involved to foster respect, trust, honesty and communication.
A healthy relationship can help you feel confident and comfortable with your sexuality and make safer and consensual decisions about the type of sex you are having or not having. A healthy relationship involves respecting each other’s choices and boundaries especially when it comes to sex. You should not feel pressured to do anything that you do not want to do.
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Monogamy is when a person has only one sexual or romantic partner at a time. Monogamy is very common in North American society and many people believe it is the best way to be with another person. However, while monogamy is great for many people, there are also many fulfilling options outside of monogamy. You might also find the common misconception that monogamy is meant for straight, cisgender couples. Monogamy is right for whoever wants to be monogamous regardless of gender and sexuality. It is important that you decide by yourself and with your partner(s) what is best for you and your lifestyle. When choosing to have a sexual partner, it is important to think about how to have safer sex with your partner and what that might look like.
Non-monogamy is when a person has or is open to having more than one sexual or romantic partner at a time. This term can apply to anything that is outside of monogamy. In fact, there are many different forms of non-monogamy, and it will look different for each non-monogamous relationship. People may choose to be in a non-monogamous relationship for many reasons, just as someone may choose to be in a monogamous relationship for many reasons. Despite what some people might say, there is nothing wrong with non-monogamy if it feels right for you. When choosing to have more than one sexual partner, it is important to think about how to have safer sex with each partner and what that might look like. This involves a lot of trust, respect and communication.One common form of non-monogamy is polyamory. To be polyamorous or polyam means to be open to having more than one sexual or romantic partner at a time, and can often mean you are in love with more than one person at a time. Being polyamorous can be a sense of identity for some people, and is often tied to certain beliefs and values.
For more information about being polyam, check out this online guide!
Dating
There might be a point in your life when you want to start dating. Dating can look different for everyone, it can be casual or super serious or somewhere in between. It is important that you are on the same page with the people you are dating and have an open and honest conversation about your needs. Dating can be overwhelming, especially when you are younger and identify as LGBTQ+. Maybe other people don’t know how you identify or maybe you are unsure of other people’s identities; this can make dating more complicated and challenging. Just know that no matter where you are, there are queer people around you, even if you don’t know that they are queer. If you can, try to find a queer community in your town or city. You can find this community many different ways - through friends and family, through a queer organization, or through online networks. Surrounding yourself with queer people can be a great way to meet new people and start dating. Of course, it will all depend on your specific situation and your needs and desires. No matter what your identity, dating can take time. There is no ideal timeline for when you should start dating.
Hookups or hooking up refers to having some sort of sexual contact with someone without being in a relationship with them. It could be making out, sex, masterbation, whatever you think is light and fun! Hooking up can mean many different things to different people, so it’s important that you have an open and honest conversation with your partner(s) about what it means to you and what your expectations are. When choosing to have more than one sexual partner, it is important to think about how to have safer sex with each partner and what that might look like. For example, people with different bodies and identities might have different ideas of what safer sex looks like so it is really important to have open communication with everyone involved.
For more information about dating, hook ups and relationships, check out:
Hooking Up
Boundary Basics
Break ups can be very difficult and might feel like the end of the world, but everyone goes through them at some point in their life! Everyone handles breakups in their own way. There is no right way to break up. It can be helpful to talk to people you trust about your break up and how you are feeling. Remember that you are always worthy and deserving of love and this does not change if you are single or in a relationship. If you are the one that is breaking up with someone, check out this resource to help you through the process: Breaking Up is Hard to Do
If someone has broken up with you, it might feel like a total rejection. To learn more about dealing with rejection, check out: Dealing with Rejection